Old age jokes

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What's the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma?
When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head.

Rating: 2.0 |

Two really old guys decided they would go out and try to play a round of
golf together. They get on the first tee and the first old guy says to the
second, "My eyesight isn't what it used to be. Can you watch my ball for
me?".
The second guy says, "Sure! I see fine. Go ahead and hit."
So the first old man steps up to the tee and really hits it. He turns to
his buddy and says, "Did you see it?".
"Sure!", says his buddy.
"Where did it go?", the first guy asks.
The second old man thinks for a minute and says, "I can't remember."

Rating: 2.0 |

What's the best thing about turning 65?

No more calls from insurance salesmen.

Rating: 2.0 |

"What's wrong, sonny?" asked the old timer sympathetically, coming over
to the little kid who was sitting on the curb, crying his heart out.
"I'm crying 'cause I can't do what the big boys do!" So the old man sat
down and wept too.

Rating: 3.6 |

How do you get four old ladies to say the F word?

Have the fifth one say.... BINGO!

Rating: 3.0 |

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